When told about Carolyn's stomach cancer, for most people the second thing out of their mouth right after sincere concern for her health is the question "What can we(I) do for you or Arnold while you're in the hospital?" This is not surprising, given the quality of our friends. Quite often we'll simply say that I'm pretty independent and capable on my own but thank you anyway. Carolyn has suggested to some families that they invite me to dinner at their place. That would certainly be interesting. I can think of a lot of ward members I would enjoy knowing better. Most people don't realize that Carolyn's work has required her to be on the road 50% to 70% of the time which has forced me to be pretty self reliant.
The most puzzling offer for help so far was a request to clean up our house just before Carolyn is released from the hospital so she'll come home to a spanking clean house. Other than steam cleaning the carpet, mopping the tile floors, or dusting virtually everything that doesn't move, I can't think that that much is really available for cleaning purposes. Of course men can't see the same dirt that women can.
Heck, take any and all offers just to make the folks who made them feel like they are doing something. I thought it was pretty funny when we tried to call Mom on Sunday and couldn't condole with her because she was busy still trying to run the activities committee, but some folks really get desperate when there isn't anything they "can do to help."
ReplyDeleteHi. We just heard your news from my parents. Just want you to know you're in our thoughts and prayers and we will continue to check your blog for updates! Please pass our love to Carolyn!
ReplyDelete